Oh, it really wasn’t so bad. But it was one of those days – woke up groggy, made brekky for the family, watched anxiously as my father-in-law frantically re-packed for the airport, choked up as he broke down in tears kissing Micah goodbye, and then felt this pang of emptiness as I cleaned up his room and laundered his sheets.
Dropped Micah off at childcare and then drove to Melton to do some visitations. After a few visits, there was one more person I really wanted to see, and I wanted to take her a framed picture of Micah I had promised her, so I dropped by the Woodgrove shopping center. Having purchased the frame, I assembled it in the boot and then shut the boot – only to realise with a sinking heart that the car keys were inside.
I called the various people I now disappointed (the member I was going to visit, another member I was supposed to drive to a Leadership Meeting in Tullamarine, the senior pastor of Northpoint, Sam, who I had made go to my place only to have to walk back home, and my husband, who had to cancel a bible study and miss a meeting to come and bail me out).
Roy suggested I call the locksmith, but they quoted me $150 and said “we’ll give it our best go, but no guarantees.” Horror stories of locksmiths damaging the wiring of the car, etc. came to haunt me and I could not bring myself to secure their services.
So I refused to call the locksmith and insisted Roy come pick me up. I emphatically stated, “I’m not paying a locksmith. I’m staying here until you come, even if I have to wait all night.” I hung up without waiting for a reply, as if to prove my point.
So Roy picked up Micah from childcare and came an hour out of his way to drop off the spare key. I thought the least I could do was take Micah back, so I took our hungry, tired boy and noticed he was barefoot. “He didn’t have any shoes on when I picked him up,” Roy said.
I had forgotten to put them on this morning when I had dropped him off! Oops.
My poor hungry, tired, and barefoot boy wailed all the way home (all 50 minutes) and by the time I got home, I felt like crying myself.
My day was not really a bad day, compared to so many people out there who struggled with real pain today, but it was not a day I was proud of . . . not only for my forgetfulness, but for my reactions and attitude throughout the evening.
I had been angry at myself, angry at the exorbitant cost of a locksmith, angry at Roy for suggesting a locksmith, angry at the Schnitz employee for giving me chicken in my veggie wrap, angry at the tailgaters on my drive home…
Where did all this anger come from?
I don’t know, but I knew I didn’t want it to linger in my spirit.
The wise king said, “Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools” (Ecclesiastes 7:9). Anger is counter-productive; it keeps us from making rational choices.
Paul counselled, “In your anger do not sin; do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold” (Ephesians 4:26,27). I think I gave the devil a welcome mat today.
James also advised, “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires” (James 1:19,20).
As I reflect on my day, I realise that I should have prayed more and fumed less. Instead of spending so much time being upset, I should have been grateful for having been “stuck” at a mall, with bathrooms, restaurants, and cell phone chargers so accessible. I should have been gracious to others and myself, for how can I love my neighbours if I can’t even love myself?
So as the sun sets and the day folds, I pray to the God who is slow to anger and abounding in mercy, Father, forgive me, for I have sinned…
And I can almost hear His soothing voice say, “So you had a bad day…”
by: Jinha Kim
"But those who drink the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life." John 4:14